Saturday, January 25, 2014

ELIZABETH .....ABC 20/20....and ALCOHOLISM

I  HAD  NO  IDEA [HAD NOT HEARD]  THAT ELIZABETH V.  FROM  THE  FAMOUS  20/20  ABC  PROGRAM,  WAS  AN  ALCOHOLIC.

THE  INTERVIEW  ON  20/20  LAST  EVENING,  AND  WHAT  YOU  CAN  READ  ON  THE  ABC  NEWS  WEBSITE.....  WAS  INSPIRING!  I  SHED  SOME  TEARS!

WHY  DID  IT  HIT  ME  SO  DEEPLY?

NO,  NOT  BECAUSE  I'VE  HAD  ANY  TROUBLE  WITH  ALCOHOL,  BUT....WELL  HERE'S  WHY:

10  YEARS  AGO  I  WAS  HIRED  TO  TEACH  GUITAR,  BANJO,  MANDOLIN,  UKE,  STEEL  GUITAR,  BY  A  YOUNG  LOVELY  LADY  -  35  YEARS  OLD.  I  WAS  A  MUSIC  TEACHER  IN  HER  MUSIC  SCHOOL.

WE  ACTUALLY  BECAME  VERY  GOOD  FRIENDS,  AND  I  WAS  OFTEN  INVITED  OVER  TO  HER  AND  HER  HUSBAND'S  HOME  FOR  AN  EVENING  MEAL.  THE  THREE  OF  US,  SOMETIMES  WITH  OTHERS,  WOULD  ATTEND  MUSIC  CONCERTS  IN  TOWN  AND  OUT  OF  TOWN.

SHE  HAD  NEVER  HAD  ANY  CHILDREN.  HER  HUSBAND  BECAME  A  PILOT  FOR  THE  CANADIAN  WEST-JET  COMPANY,  ABOUT  5  YEARS  AGO.  HE  WAS  AWAY  A  LOT.  THEIR  MARRIAGE  SUFFERED  QUITE  A  LOT,  AND  THEY  BECAME  SOMEWHAT  STRANGERS  TO  EACH  OTHER.  BUT  SHE  HAD  LOTS  OF  FRIENDS,  MYSELF  ONE  OF  THEM;  SHE  HAD  LOTS  OF  PIANO  STUDENTS,  AND  ALL  SEEMED  PRETTY  GOOD  OVERALL  IN  HER  LIFE.

ANOTHER  MUTUAL  FRIEND  AND  MYSELF  NOTICED  OVER  A  PERIOD  OF  A  YEAR,  THAT  THE  ONE  GLASS  OF  WINE  WITH  A  MEAL [WHEN  WE  ATE  AT  A  RESTAURANT  TOGETHER]  BECAME  TWO  GLASSES,  THEN  THREE,  THEN  FOUR.

THE  MUTUAL  FRIEND  AND  I  WOULD  TALK  ABOUT....WELL  "DO  YOU  NOTICE  HAVE  MANY  GLASSES  OF  WINE  SHE'S  DRINKING  WITH  THE  MEAL."

SHE  WOULD  COME  TO  THE  MUSIC  SCHOOL  WITH  ONE  OF  THOSE  LARGE  TYPES  OF  COFFEE  MUGS  WITH  A  TOP  ON.  NOW  MY  NOSE  IS  ONLY  ABOUT  50%  AS  GOOD  AT  SMELLING  THINGS  AS  THE  AVERAGE  PERSON.  ANOTHER  LADY  TEACHER  PULLED  ME  TO  ONE  SIDE  AND  ASKED  ME  IF  I  DETECTED  ANY  ALCOHOL  ON  HER  BREATH.  I  SAID  NO,  BUT  TOLD  HER  MY  NOSE  WAS  NOT  THAT  GOOD  FOR  SMELLING  THINGS.  THIS  OTHER  TEACHER  TOLD  ME  THERE  WAS  ALCOHOL  IN  THE  MUG  NOT  JUICE  OR  COFFEE,  AND  SOME  OF  HER  PARENTS  OF  CHILDREN  SHE  WAS  TEACHING,  COULD  SMELL  ALCOHOL  ON  HER  BREATH.  I  AGREED  I  THOUGHT  SHE  HAD  AN  ALCOHOL  PROBLEM.

ONE  DAY  THE  MOTHER  OF  ONE  YOUNG  LAD  I  WAS  TEACHING  CALLED  ME  TO  ASK  IF  I   KNEW  ABOUT  THE  ALCOHOL  PROBLEM  THE  OWNER  OF  THE  MUSIC  SCHOOL  HAD.  I  SAID  I  DID.  THE  MOTHER  KNOWING  I  WAS  A  GOOD  FRIEND  OF  THE  OWNER,  ASKED  ME  TO  FACE  HER  WITH  THE  PROBLEM,  AS  SOMETHING  HAD  TO  BE  DONE,  BECAUSE  THE  MUSIC  SCHOOL  WAS  IN  A  LOCAL  COMMUNITY  CENTER,  AND  THE  BOARD  MEMBERS [HER  HUSBAND  WAS  A  BOARD  MEMBER]  OF  THE  CENTER  ALL  KNEW  ABOUT  IT.....SOMETHING  HAD TO  BE  DONE.

I  SAID  I  WOULD  INDEED  NOW  SPEAK  TO  HER,  I  GUESS  "CONFRONT"  HER  ABOUT  HER  DRINKING  PROBLEM.  I  DID  THAT  VERY  EVENING.  SHE  WAS  NOT  PLEASED  WITH  ME  AT  ALL.  THIS  IS  OFTEN  THE  REACTION  OF  ALCOHOLICS.... A  DENIAL  REACTION.  JUST  NOT  WILLING  TO  FACE  IT.

THE  COMMUNITY  BOARD  DEMANDED  SHE  GO  FOR  PROFESSIONAL  HELP.  SHE  DID,  AND  WAS  CLEAN  FOR  ABOUT  5  MONTHS.  BUT  SLOWLY  RETURNED  TO  THE  WINE  ONCE  MORE.

THE  COMMUNITY  CENTER  HAD  NO  CHOICE  BUT  TO  CANCEL  THE  CONTRACT.  THE  MUSIC  SCHOOL  WAS  CLOSED  AT  THE  END  OF  JUNE  2013.

NOW  BY  THIS  TIME  SHE  HAD  MOVED  OVER  TO  DRINKING  HARD  LIQUOR,  VODKA  ETC.  HER  FRIENDS [MYSELF  INCLUDED]  HAD  REALLY  NO  IDEA  JUST  HOW  MUCH  HARD  ALCOHOL  SHE  WAS  DRINKING.  DURING  THAT  SUMMER  OF  2013  SHE  WOULD  CALL  ME  NOW  AND  AGAIN,  BEMOANING  THE  MUSIC  SCHOOL  WAS  CLOSED  OUT  OF  THE  COMMUNITY  CENTER.  ONCE  MORE  IT  GAVE  ME  THE CHANCE  TO  CONFRONT  HER  IN  STRAIGHTFORWARD  WORDS,  THAT  SHE  WAS  AN  ALCOHOLIC  AND  NEEDED  TO  GET  PROFESSIONAL  HELP.

THE  SUMMER  AND  FALL  WENT  BY  AND  I  DID  NOT  HEAR  FROM  HER  VERY  MUCH  AT  ALL.

DECEMBER  22  -  2013  I  WAS  DRIVING  OUT  TO  VISIT  WITH  MY  DAD.  HALF  WAY  THERE  I  RECEIVED  A  PHONE  CALL  FROM  A  FRIEND  OF  THIS  LADY,  TELLING  ME  SHE  HAD  GONE  INTO  HOSPITAL,  IN  A  LIFE  AND  DEATH  SITUATION.  HER  KIDNEYS  WERE  SHUTTING  DOWN,  AND  IF  SHE   LIVED  IT  WOULD  BE  A  LIVER  TRANSPLANT  FOR  SURE.

AT  11 PM  DECEMBER  25,  I  RECEIVED  A  PHONE  CALL  TO  SAY  SHE  HAD  DIED  AT  10  PM  THAT  EVENING.

SHE  WAS  ONLY  45  YEARS  OLD!!

I  THEN  WAS  TOLD [HAD  NOT  BEEN  TO  UP  TO  THAT  POINT]  THAT  BACK  IN  LATE  OCTOBER  SHE  HAD  GONE  INTO  THE  HOSPITAL;  THEY  HAD  DONE  A  BLOOD  TEST,  AND  HER  BLOOD  WAS  SO  MESSED  UP,  THEY  TOLD  HER  SHE  HAD  ONLY  ABOUT  A  MONTH  TO  LIVE!

AS  ELIZABETH  OF  ABC  20/20  SAID,  DENIAL  AND  DENIAL  IS  HUGE,  ADMITTING TO  YOURSELF  YOU  ARE  AN  ALCOHOLIC  IS  EXTREMELY  HARD  TO  DO;  SHE  SAID  IT  TOOK  HER  A  LONG  TIME  TO  ADMIT  IT  AND  TO  SEEK  PROFESSIONAL  HELP.  THANKFULLY  SHE  DID  SEEK  PROFESSIONAL  HELP,  AND  SHE'S  ALIVE  AND  BACK  TO  WORK  WITH  ABC  NEWS  COMPANY.

WELL  DONE  ELIZABETH.  NOW  YOUR  STORY  WILL  HELP  AND  INSPIRE  SOME  OTHERS  TO  FIND  FREEDOM  FROM  THIS  ADDICTION  OF  ALCOHOLISM.
...........

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